10/22/09

Dammit All To Hell!

So. I see the god-damned Phillies have made it into the god-damned World Series again, huh?! What happened, Colorado? Los Angeles? Y'all couldn't do me that ONE solid and crush those mofos?

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Dear Colorado Rockies: I thought we had an understanding. Were you or were you not put in charge of sending the Phillies home with their tails tucked beneath their jock straps? I'm pretty sure that's we agreed upon.

*checks contract*

YUP, right here in black and white letters... you were supposed to CRUSH THEM.

For you treachery, you are now dead to me. DEAD I say.


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Dear LA Dodgers: Are you kidding me? Like, for real? You kick ass all season to let the god-damned Phillies steal your glory? Really? Joe, I expected better from you, I really did. You broke my heart.

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So now we wait. Will the Yankees remind the Phillies that last year was a fluke? Or will the Angels hand them an easy win?

And YES that sentence is the equivalent of me stating: If the Yankees make it to the world series the Phillies are toast, but if the Angels make it they will need more than those bitchass halos to get that trophy!

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PS- As I write this, Yankees are losing to the Angels in Game 5, 4-0, in the first inning with NO OUTS. Is it a full moon? Am I on PUNK'D? Ashton??

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